BROKEN BONES, BROKEN SYSTEM

(Photo found on a Google search for Ostriches. No listing of ownership. Thanks to who took it. It is commonly used, but wonderful.)
`````Well, he's out; no big surprise there. Disgust, yes. I had written a blog about "The Runaway" and in my comments section, I had mentioned her father; how he had been the victim of a crime. I'll elaborate here.
`````This guy has always worked hard and things have never come easy. He's got a wonderful heart, with a love of kids and dogs. After the bills are paid, there's never anything left. No trips to Disneyland and no luxuries. He's never judged anybody. His mother is, literally, the woman who phones radio talk shows and expresses the opinion that more should be done to help those who are needy. She collects lost people the way I collect stray cats. The fact that they might have done three years in the hole doesn't deter her if they're making a concentrated effort to go straight. She can walk into the toughest biker bar and fit right in.
`````About two years ago, this guy, "G", was attacked, for no reason at all. Two other people were also assaulted that night by the same party. It was some meth crazed guy who began his frenzy by beating up a woman. "G" stepped in, and this individual and his friend beat him almost to death. It was winter, and it was up north. They rolled him down a hill, where he was left. They then proceeded to jump a third person. "G" would have died had he not made some noise, which was heard by the police when they responded. He could have frozen to death; alone, cold and at the bottom of some snowbank.
`````He has had to have nine titanium plates put into his face. The damage was so bad that his mother did not recognize him in the hospital. He did not look like himself. When it is cold, he feels it. His eye-sight has been affected, and he therefore can no longer do his previous occupation. He must make a long trip to get treatment in Vancouver.
`````This wonderful, caring person will never be the same. The P.O.S. who did it? He got only fifteen months for his troubles, and he completed his education to boot. He served his sentence "up north" so as not to disturb his family too much. The system is broken. When the Fisheries Minister had a pie thrown at him by a protester, he was aghast and likened it to a terrorist act.
`````A pie in the face compared to a broken face. You tell me which is worse.

EVIL CAUGHT ON CAMERA

This time, the bad guy confessed. Quite frankly, I'm sure that he did it not out of any concern for the victims or their family. Sociopaths have no empathy. This guy wanted the fame (or rather, infamy), of being known as the "Crossbow Killer." His name is all over the papers in England. Without doing these crimes, he would never have achieved any sort of recognition on his own wherein his name would have become known. At the age of 40, he was still working towards his PhD in Psychology. His field of study was serial killers. Something tells me that his research would never have warranted any write-ups in academic journals.

He posted photos of himself shirtless on websites. On the surface, he appeared to be clean cut. Look a little deeper, and he had issues. He had a violent past. He had assaulted his previous girlfriends, to the point that one lived in fear of him. He had been caught shop-lifting and had slashed the throat of somebody. I would suggest that such an act is attempted murder, no? As late as l992, he had held a knife to a girl. Yet, he was still allowed to enter and pursue academic work in Psychology. I have to ask if somebody would, at some point, have allowed this man to set up shop and practice? One has to wonder if he didn't study psychology because he wanted to figure out what was wrong with himself. Perhaps there was something wrong in the family, early on, as his mother was convicted of benefits fraud (what they call welfare or social assistance).

I've blogged in the past about the missing women in the downtown Eastside of Vancouver. Because of their lifestyle and line of work, it was all to easy for so many of them to disappear before anybody paid attention. People saw them as a "vice" and not as a person. They became a stereotype and were judged as leading to their own demise.

I want people to look at these photos and think of what it must have been like for this woman, and for the others that he killed. Had this video surveillance not caught him, he would have gone on to do it again. In fact, only hours after killing, he tried to pick up another woman. She picked up bad "vibes" and left. I've also written of those "vibes"; those feelings that animals certainly have and we has humans do too. At times we don't want to be rude, and we override that sense which tells us to "get out of Dodge." That gut feeling is there for a reason---there are bad people in this world who mean us harm. Listen to that voice. Some of them look like really clean-cut people.

This guy was a student, who might have gone on to instruct, had he not been caught. Yet, he ate his victims; raw and cooked. Frankly, I think anybody who meets a stranger online is engaging in very risky conduct. He killed people in an apartment in a civilized city of millions. If that doesn't give people pause to think, I don't know what will.

ONE MORE FOR 'MOTHER OF THE YEAR'

Ten-day-old baby dies after going through entire spin cycle in washing machine Mail Online

````It seems as though everytime I read the paper there's some horrid story about animal abuse. I cannot go there, as I'm too depressed already, and it just drags me further down. But, I read this story and I like blogging about crime. Here's a woman who should have had her tubes tied. In fact, her own family had gone to the courts a while ago and were so concerned about her children that they had tried to have her parental rights taken away from her. The courts had ruled in her favour. I certainly hope that judge has to answer for this, but I highly doubt it. When things go bad the little people are held accountable, but never those sitting on the actual throne.

`````Ms Fidler had been caught using crystal meth when she was four months pregnant with her third child. One only has to wonder how her other two children make out on a daily basis. She has had other arrests in the past as well. I am certain that getting caught is only the tip of the iceberg.

`````After her daughter was born, a family member went to check up on her. They had expressed concern over her past conduct and her ability to properly look after the child, who was ten days old. When the woman entered the room, she found Ms Fidler passed out and heard a strange noise coming from the washing machine. She described it on one news site as the sound a machine makes when the spin cycle is out of balance, and opened the lid to make it stop. When she did so, she spotted the body of the baby inside the washing machine. Needless to say, 911 was phoned but there was nothing that could be done. The baby had been inside the spin cycle for 40 minutes. The scene was so upsetting that seasoned paramedics and police officers broke out in tears. How they managed to restrain themselves from throttling this woman is beyond me. I give them credit for being professional.

`````This is where I begin to highly doubt her story. The blame is being placed upon a crystal meth binge. Yes, that would inspire her to start to clean the house, as compulsive behaviour is engaged in. However, she was described as being found "passed out". Look at the mug shot of her---her eyes are that of a person who is on an opiode substance. Users of speed are hyper and they do not pass out. My question is the following: did she kill the child out of frustration and then come up with this story, or was she using multiple substances?

`````No matter what, this woman shouldn't even be allowed to own a goldfish. Being high is not an excuse. I hope my computer lasts long enough to follow up on this one. Again, kudos to the medical personnel and cops for not killing her. Yes, it's their job, but we're all human and we have our limits.

MAYBE THE GUY LOOKED LIKE FABIO

Photo of juror Gillian Guess
By Alex Waterhouse Hayward
Located via Images on the Internet Google Search

I guess the only reason I can come up with is that reading too many romance novels makes susceptible women stupid. How else would one go about explaining something like this? A woman who was serving on the jury in a trial was caught attempting to pass a note to a marshall. In it, she detailed the time and place that she wanted to meet him.

*

This is an horrific case. I've left a link in case people want to read about it. The actions of this juror meant that there was a possibility the defence team could have sought a new trial. After all, how much was she paying attention to the evidence if she was so enthralled with checking out the marshall? There just might be reasonable grounds to suggest that the client did not get a fair hearing. Pity the loved ones having to sit through this again, not to mention the great costs to the tax payer. In brief, the man on trial, had broken into a home and attacked the father of the house. He was an ex-con on parole, who then proceeded to rape the mother and forced her to withdraw money from an account. For seven hours this family was subjected to sheer terror. In the end, gasoline was poured upon the bodies of the two children and the home set ablaze. The father, who had been beaten with a bat, bearly made it.

* Defense: Jail worse than death for Conn. defendant

*

Couldn't this woman have kept her mind on the matter at hand rather then giving way to flights of fancy about finding "Mr Right." How romantic could the moment have been, when she made the decision to write it? She'd been listening to graphic details of death and viewed photos, yet she was thinking of a tyrst. Women have long bitched about men always thinking of booty-calls,

yet an individual such as this juror, is just as pathetic. It gives credence to the arguement that we're too emotional and thus cannot be trusted in positions of authority.

*

I was reminded of the infamous case of Gillian Guess, who was the first juror to be tried for allowing her actions to cross the line. Gillian Guess did not remain an impartial jury member when she did her civic duty in judging Peter Gill. The eye contact and hair flipping was so over the top that others in the court reported it. They began to meet in Stanley Park, and after his acquittal, had regular contact. Authority was granted to wire-tap her phone and her house; including her bedroom. Ms Guess did herself no favours, as she seemed to thrive in the spotlight. Whilst complaining of being a single mother on a fixed income, she sported designer sunglasses and new outfits. In fact, the length of her skirts became an issue at her trial. People compared her to one of the characters in the British comedy "Absolutely Fabulous." Gillian was convicted and did time for her actions.

*

Acting out in the same horndog way that only some guys do (most are decent and don't engage in that behavior), does not make women look emancipated. It makes them look stupid and slatternly. Please, don't even get me going on the types of women who send love letters to killers like Richard Ramirez and Ted Bundy. That's a whole other blog. Perhaps when they start selecting perspective jurors they need to weed them out by asking if they are devotees of really bad fiction and believe that unicorns are real.

THE RUNAWAY COMES BACK

`````She is at home now; safe with her Dad and Grandmother, but it could have been bad. The girl is fifteen and she has no idea of what people are like. I don't want her to find out either. I know; as an adult I have to see it on a daily basis and it's left me jaundiced towards the world. There isn't always a happy ending. People will do bad things because it gives them pleasure and because they like that sense of power.

`````A while ago, her parents divorced and the other day, she ran away. This time, she stayed with her friend and was found safely at her home. The problem is that once they do it, they are prone to do it again unless they are given some other way to express their pain and anger. They usually find salvation via some loser older boyfriend. It's sadly ironic that they didn't like the rules at home, but they'll accept it from some guy who becomes increasingly more controlling.

`````Her Dad loves her to death; he was beyond himself with worry and grief when he heard that she was missing. The entire Pickton case is so fresh in the minds of everybody. You always think that this cannot happen to somebody that you know or within your extended family. It's so frustrating for the parents because there isn't much the one person can do unless the other individual is on board. After a certain grade they cannot be forced to go to school, so they cannot be declared a truant. As for the age of consent, they don't care as long as the guy she opts to get involved with isn't much older then her. It's so sickening that they will fine the crap out of you when you forget to buckle your seatbelt, but a kid can spiral absolutely out of control and out of reach and there's nothing that a parent can do.

`````For the time being, she's in the process of starting a new school and settling in with her Dad. I really hope it works out. This is a good kid who has no idea how quickly it can go bad. I guess I'll hear more when I visit my mother tomorrow (in a few hours, actually).

AND NOW THIS...

`````The above, Wendy Lewis, can hardly be defined as an English rose or the paragon of womanhood. Indeed, anybody doing the "perp walk", unless it's somebody like Gandhi and it's being undertaken for moral grounds, is going to find it difficult to take the high road. Everyonce in a while, though, you come across a story that makes you ask yourself "What is the world coming to?" You hope it's a sign of justifiable moral indignation and not just old age creeping in.

.

`````Our leading lady decided that it would be a good idea one night (actually, it was about 0500, so it was at the tail end of a very long night), to relieve herself at a cenotaph . A lady as refined as herself always does her toilette before she performs a sex act upon a random stranger in public. Now, at this time of year, it is fairly light, so this act was witnessed by others as well as a CCTV camera (the urination and the act which made Paris Hilton famous). It was made upon the names of men who had died during both World Wars. Members of the public rightfully took umbrage and complained to the police.

.

`````When she appeared in court, a group of vetrans appeared to greet her with what they called a "Wall of Dishonour." She told them to "F Off." She then disappeared, and had to be arrested, when she attacked a police woman. She somehow managed to avoid jail in all of this. Knowing how to play the system, she blames the crime on drink and heroin usage. In reading this story, I couldn't help but notice that she has two kids. Since her age was listed as 32, these kids cannot be all that old. In every article on her it mentions her smoking and drug usage. It stated that she didn't work. She was out until 0500 in the morning. She doesn't have the good sense to show up in court wearing proper attire. What the courts should have done is slapped her butt in a classroom which taught proper breeding. She should have learned how one dresses and what the people in the two wars sacrificed so that she could sit on her butt and not work. Until she understands the magnitude of that sacrifice, she'll never know why her crime was so bad. Some people will forever be selfish and entitled and feel no need to give anything back to society. For the sake of her own kids she needs to learn how to speak and dress properly so that they don't grow up thinking that it's okay to conduct oneself in such a manner. Perhaps she should have to look at the photos of the young men who died and hear the stories of those who served with them. Then they would be real to her. I doubt she's a sociopath; just an idiot.

.

`````In the meantime, you just hope she doesn't have anymore kids. You just know this isn't going to end well for them.

,

`````Incidentally, I am beyond sick of people using the lack of funds for their conduct. My parents had nothing when they came here and my father worked hard in a horrid job. My toys were second hand as were many of my clothes. My mother sewed a lot of my items. However, everything was clean and looked after. People need to give that excuse a rest.

FINALLY, A WARRANT

Calgary, Regina arrest warrants issued in assault case of Dustin Lafortune - Winnipeg Free Press

This is such a disturbing story and it's great that a warrant has finally been issued. This poor guy was found in the hospital, weighing less then 90 pounds. He had once been 245 pounds. His family had tried to file a missing person's report on him, but in something which sounds all too familiar now, they were given a hard time in doing so. As it turns out, he was being confined by his roommate. We don't really know why, as when he was discovered in the hospital, in another city, he had a brain injury. He also had part of his tongue cut off as well has his lips. It was only via the actions of his family that his story got out there at all. They posted the gruesome photos on Facebook, where they were desperate in seeking information as to who could have done this. They had a pretty good idea, so they launched their own invesitation. The thing that really bothers me is that the person who lived near this man and the roomate heard "disturbing sounds", yet did nothing. How often does that happen with abused women? The Facebook page was open to all of the public; one did not need to be a friend. Dustin Lafortune has gained some weight, but has a very long way to go. I guess it's meant a lot to the family that they've gotten so much support.

A LINK TO INFORMATION ON THE PICKTON CRIME

CBC News - British Columbia - Pickton investigation to be reviewed by B.C.

If you click on the side, where you see PDF Document, a very long written report will come up. Although it was written by an officer, it is very critical of how this investigation was handled. I have done a quick look at it, but plan on reading the entire thing. The police had not planned on releasing this until later, but one of the local papers released snippets of it. This forced their hand.

THIS WOMAN IS NOT DISPOSABLE

I know it's because of all the talk of Pickton in the news lately, but I thought of Vanessa B. Vanessa was another woman who died at the hands of yet one more evil man in a bad part of town. She also happened to be somebody I had gone to school with.

I didn't know her well; she hung with a different crowd then me. She always seemed to be in a good mood and I envied her ability to fit in. Vanessa was invited to the parties---the ones that somebody like me never heard of. Back then I had the reputation of being a straight kid and the lines were evenly drawn. Everybody knew on which side of the fence others fell.

Vanessa's smile is what I remember most about her. She was the sort of person who cut classes every once in a while. She didn't stand out for academic achievements. When she was happy, her entire face lit up and it was real. So many girls, the so called "popular" ones, had the forced, faked smiles of sales women. That's where the mouth moves but the eyes stay flat. Even as a person of that young age I could see through them and I recognized them for the practiced performers that they were. Think of those dolls with the strings in their backs; give it a tug and out comes a response. Not so Vanessa.

I never heard anything negative about her. There were a few girls who had reputations, yet she wasn't one of them. Vanessa wasn't one of the few girls who got pregnant in senior year. No, she liked to party, but no more then many others.

Graham Greene wrote, "There is a point of no return, unremarked at the time, in most lives." Where was that for her? Could she look back at some period in her life and see it? Was there any attempt to change things? We've all had those awful moments, usually in the dead of night or early in the morning, where we are forced to face ourselves and the mistakes we've made; where we must confront the fact that we've hurt others.

Somehow, Vanessa ended up downtown and evidentally worked as a prostitute to make ends meet at times. She was an alcoholic who also used some drugs. It is reported that before she died she was despondent over the fact that social services had taken her child into care, as it had been born addicted to a chemical.

How did she get there? Where did that feeling come from? Was it merely a case of a party that got out of hand and a predisposition to addiction? Or did she have some horrid unease with herself. I know that her mother loved her intensely. After her death, she spoke out in public on behalf of victim's interests. She also raised the point that Vanessa's race may have had something to do with it. To be honest, I really hadn't noticed. She didn't look particularily different to me. However, her mother stated that one of the parents was black, while the other was white. At the time I first moved there, I would call the town "Vanilla Wonderbread", in that it was very, very white with almost everybody having a WASP background. I'd just moved from the city, in a largely Italian part of town. Years later, when I look back, I have to concede that there weren't more then two or three black faces in my high-school. Although she didn't look it, perhaps she was conscious of it. I know that the media was wrong in reporting her as being native.

God, did it matter to her? I wish she'd known that I would have loved to have had her smile. That's all I saw about her. All these stupid things that can derail us.

Whatever the reasons for her self hatred, she found herself in a cheap rooming house with a man who didn't hate himself; he hated women. Vanessa wasn't the only woman that would die at his hands. Several women would meet their demise because of him. He would give them money to continue drinking. They would be found with very high blood alcohol levels. In fact, some speculate that those levels could only have been reached had he poured the booze down their throats. They choked on their vomit, face down on a floor or on some stained bed in a pay-by-the week room.

What disgusts me most about this case is that the police actually had him under surveillance for a while, and interrupted a couple of incidents. Otherwise, there could have been more deaths. Thus, they know that he encouraged the women to drink. They heard him do it. One has to ask how good of a job they did in that so many died. As with my blog on the prostitutes, it's probably by virtue of their professions that nobody really cared.

Prior to our highschool reunion we got a mailing about people that they couldn't locate. Vanessa's name was on it. I phoned the committee and let them know what had happened with Vanessa. I was glad to see that there was a placard and a flower with her name on a table at the reunion.

JUST A DEAD HOOKER?

READ THIS BOOK---MISSING SARAH---MAGGIE DE VRIES

BUY THIS BOOK---HEROINES--LINCOLN CLARKES

LEIGH MINER

APRIL REOCH---THE PROVINCE

Andrea Joesbury---The Province Paper

Well, thank goodness that Willie Pickton won't be getting a new trial. I won't get into the details here. Suffice to say that they are available and everybody knows. Let's spare the families and the tax payers that go around.

What I want to write about is what so many people thought...why it probably took so long for this guy to come to justice. They were just missing hookers, right? I mean, it's not like they were somebody's Mom in a mini-van. They sort of brought about their own demise, standing out there on the street corner? They probably would have died from a drug overdose anyways? With so many other "real" victims, why would the cops put these women as their top priority? Sadly, I could go on. There were jokes made at the time. I won't go into some the ones that I heard.

Perhaps it was the "Missing" poster itself. Many of the shots were mugshots from arrests; black and white photos under the harshed of lighting, taken in less then ideal conditions. Imagine having your headshot taken after being skinfrisked, printed and the ride in the back of a van that smells of vomit. Most likely, it's the end of the shift and the lack of drugs are starting to kick in. There's the knowledge that there's apt to be an ass kicking from the pimp for not making enough money. Worst of all, there's the prospect of spending time in a cell without drugs or the chance of a wake-up shot. Yes, smile for the camera.

I used to walk by that poster every day at work and I'd stop to look at it sometimes. I would search it to see if there were any new additions. I was looking for one face in particular. In highschool, my friend's sister had been a prostitute and heroin addict at the age of sixteen. We were living in a small town at the time and people just didn't talk about that sort of thing. If she were home, my friend knew enough to hide her gold chains and we wouldn't leave our purses around. Yet, I found her a glamourous sort of creature; me, with my bland life. She was so pretty and savvy.

Nobody deserves to be the victim of assault or abduction. Let's face it, however. When Soccer Mom disappears from the mall, people look harder. Her missing poster features her smiling, at the Christmas party and wearing nice clothes. The picture would have been selected carefully. The news media puts the story out there and people come out because they care.

It took a long time for the media to care about the missing women in Vancouver. It's incredible that so many could just disappear. These are women who are not mobile. Anybody aware of this lifestyle understands that. They are dependant on picking up their methadone at a set time and place. They don't function without it. They have very limited lives. In more ways then one, they are creatures of habit.

When the media did get involved, it all too often initially reduced them to stereotypes. They were prostitutes. I sometimes got the feeling that they wanted to make the story as gritty and sordid as possible. They would film in back alleys, making sure that the camera would pan in on the discarded rigs (needles) or catch others in the act of shooting up.

They missed a lot. Maggie de Vries wrote a fantastic book, "Missing Sarah" about her sister. Her sister was a deep, caring woman. Sarah was beautiful. I have always felt that the good looking of the world must have it easy, but I guess it isn't always so. Sarah went to some of the finest and most exclusive schools in Vancouver. She wrote poignant and insightful passages. Then, she was gone.

Many of these women were mothers who loved their kids dearly. There was always that battle between loving the drugs and the children. On some deep level they understood that they could not raise them well until the drugs were gone. Yet, they tried to keep in contact with their kids. It wasn't like them to miss meetings. It was hard for them to form these bonds. These were often women who had been beaten and assaulted as children themselves. Their's was not The Brady Bunch, but a shuffling from foster home to group home. How they hung on is incredible. Drugs would offer an escape and a coping mechanism. They hurt only themselves, unlike Pickton.

People need to confront their inner voices. Yes, someone might have preconceived notions about others based on their skin colour or occupation or life style. But, how we treat them is what matters. We need to recognize that we must not let those judgements guide us. If nothing else, let the deaths of these women do that. It breaks my heart to read that the police could have stopped this monster. He had been confronted by the cops in the past, but it was his word (a white, good 'ol boy), against that of a known prostitute. Nothing ever happened.

Check out Lincoln Clarke's web site. Many of the women that he photographed for his "Heroines" series, died. They are beautiful. They somehow shine in their surroundings. I have a signed copy of his book and I am haunted by their eyes. Understand that some of those women you see in the backstreets, especially in the notorious "kiddie stroll" are fourteen years old and strung out. This is not a fate that they chose.

Lincoln Clarkes Photography : World Wide Green Eyes

VICTORIAN? HARDLY.

`````Just when you thought that it was safe....she's back. This woman has more lives than a cat, evidentally. At times she has an uncanny assemblance to another cold, young, female killer who is currently on trial in Italy (Foxy Knoxy). However, while Meredith Knox smiles and primps as she smirks for the camera, Kelly Ellard showed only a grimace and disdain. For, Ellard seems to lack the intellect to know that she should at least fake having a conscience or personality for the viewing public. Sarah Palin may call herself a pitbull with lipstick. Kelly Ellard is the shark sporting the same.

`````Kelly Ellard showed no remorse at all over her involvement in the killing of Reena Virk, whose body was found under a bridge in the staid, quaint town of Victoria. She had orchestrated a beat-down of Reena for petty, teenaged girl stuff. She thought that Reena was spreading "shit" about her. As is so often the case, there was a boy that Reena had a crush on and Ellard did not take well to this.

`````The beating was particularily brutal and extended. Imagine being surrounded by a large number of girls, some of whom you thought were your friends from school. It is dark. She was hit so hard that it caused damage to the liver and pancreas. The muscles in her abdominal wall were bruised to the point that the fatty tissue separated from the muscle tissue. One would expect to see this sort of damage in car crash victims. The internal bleeding in her chest indicated that they had stomped on her. There was extensive bruising on her face and scalp. Reena's brain was swollen. In fact, there was a bruise on her brain itself which bore a sneaker print. The actual cause of death was drowning.

`````Reena, it turns out, had been held under the water by Kelly, who later told people about the bloody froth that came up. She smoked a cigarette while Reena sucked up 18 pebbles from the bottom of the bay in a last gasp for air.

`````I mentioned in a previous blog that I expect bad and evil people to exist in the world. What fascinates me is that a very large number of "so-called" normal, white middle-class kids knew who did this and said nothing. This harkens back to my blog on an event in highschool and what inspired me to study Criminology at university. It was only after the rumours had spread to the point of outsiders hearing of them that a dive team found the body. Kelly Ellard almost got away with murder.

`````How it takes four trials to convict and keep her in prison is beyond me. Nevertheless, she had just been granted her fourth kick at the can. Who does this serve? The victim's family can have no peace. The tax payers continue to foot the bill. The public is rightfully angry. On one of her retrials she beat up a 58 year old woman in a park that she thought was looking at her. Her co-accused accepted guilt and did his time. He has since cascaded through the system and Reena's family accepts that he seems truly remorseful.

`````The greatest display of grace came from Reena Virk's mother who hugged the mother of Kelly Ellard at the trial. She saw that this monster was not a reflection of her failure as a parent. Somewhere she found the strength to do that. Unfortunately, while Reena was dragged from the cold water, Kelly Ellard continues to bob like a cork in avoiding accountability.

`````May I suggest that people read "Under the Bridge" by Rebecca Godfrey. It is an excellant recounting of this entire case, up until the granting of this fourth appeal. Ms Godfrey spoke to the participants in the event (including the coaccused) and truly gets to the heart of the matter.
CBC News Indepth: The murder of Reena Virk: A timeline

LISTEN TO THE VOICE

`````Have you ever had the experience of owning a dog who likes everybody yet will display an aversion to a person for no obvious reason? The hackles will go up and the dog will growl as though it felt the need to defend you. I doubt that the animal was chasing windmills.

Dogs, like many animals, are extremely sensitive to things such as scent, changes in heat, etc. Interestingly enough, these are the same sorts of things that high-tech lie detection devices measure.

`````We are still part of the animal kingdom. We no longer have to rely on our senses to survive the way others in the food chain do so I think we've lost touch with those abilities, but I believe they are still there. People still make reference to that sort of chemistry when they talk in terms of romance. For example, they'll say that they were drawn to somebody. There's a multi billion dollar perfume industry that's looking into the power of pheromones.

`````I think that instinct can keep us alive and safe too, if we pay attention to it. I've always been very good at reading people. I've used numerous terms when I discuss it---vibes, feelings, whatever. I have not often been wrong. Even as a little kid I could tell when somebody was being insincere. I could see that while their mouth was smiling at me, their eyes had all the deadness of a shark.

`````The saddest confirmation that I ever had of this involved a man who worked for my Dad's company. My parents had gone away for their annual trip and I was looking after the family business. "John" came to pick up his cheque and I spoke with him for no more than five minutes. He was polite and did nothing wrong. When my parents returned I told my Mom that something was up with "John". I told her that I got the same vibe from him that I'd gotten from men who had real issues with women. I said that he was hiding something. My mother got really mad at me. She told me what I'd studied and done for a living had warped me and my perception of people.

`````Only a few years later, the truth came out in a horrid fashion. "John's" current wife had wanted to leave him and suddenly both were missing. It turns out that he had done ten years for killing his first wife. He had been sober since his release from prison but had started drinking when his marriage fell apart. Their bodies were found; murder/suicide.

`````I think we're socialized to be polite and because we don't want to be rude we don't pay that voice enough attention. Predators know this and take advantage of it. This is how women get hurt and made use of. This is certainly how they take advantage of the elderly. They know that they are probably on a train heading off the rails, yet they find it hard to pull the safety cord for fear of being disrespectful. Women put themselves at risk for diseases by staying with men that they suspect of cheating and most likely laughing about it. When the truth comes out, there is the double whammy because they are so often angry at themselves for having been "so stupid". That voice was there all along. Listen and heed.

`````Women can also manipulate or con others by playing the role of friend. In the meantime, there goes the bank account or the husband. One of the best movies is "All About Eve" as to some degree we've all had a "friend" like this at some point in our lives. It is actually one of the biggest and saddest betrayals out there. Yet in hindsight, when we are honest with ourselves, we have to admit our complicity in our own demise in some small way by wanting or needing that person in our lives to the point of ignoring the red flashing lights.

`````So, recognize that it isn't good to be paranoid, but don't be afraid to cross the street when those alarm bells start ringing upon sighting somebody. Know that there is a bit of a guard dog within you and let it rescue you.

THIS IS HARD

I've known for some time that I'm very much in the wrong over an issue. Yes, the person who goes on about her disdain of hypocrites finds herself in the position of acknowledging that she is allowing evil to continue. In fact, I suspect that I have a legal duty to report. By not doing so I honestly see myself as no better than the low-life who drives the get-a-way car. The accomplice after the fact.

When I was ten I met the new girl on my street. She lived with her father in a large home at the top of the lane. There were so many trees in the yard that it encased their house in permanent shadow. The air itself seemed denser. The blinds were forever drawn. Their backyard had a patio shielded on one side by a huge outdoor fireplace and chimney with landscaping which prevented anybody from seeing into the yard.

Fabiola told me that her mother had left when she was two or three, not to be heard from again. Her mother had been Spanish, which may have accounted for Fabiola's stunning and exotic looks.

But her eyes were always sad and seemed focused at times on something just out of view. Unlike most pretty girls, she seemed to want to disappear. This was made virtually impossible by the fact that she was fully developed and the only girl in our class who truly needed a bra. She was pained by the reaction her body got her.

Fabiola invited me over and it was thus that I met her father. He always seemed to be around after that and his modus operandi was consistant. The man was a pervert. He was forever trying to put his hands up my top or elsewhere. I would have none of it and wriggled away when he tried to grab me. I'd not been raised to be compliant to this sort of thing but at times it was a struggle as he would literally hide and then grab.

My friend was mortified and stressed. She told me that at her previous residence, she'd had a playmate called Pam. Evidentally, what her father had done to Pam was ongoing and "very bad". I guess Pam did not know that a person could say "no" to adults when appropriate.

I remember odd things began to occur at about this time in my own behavior. Fabiola and I once tossed a hard, metal bucket back and forth in her backyard with all the force we could muster. My mother later noticed the severe bruising all down one side of my body. Where did this need to hurt myself come from? This wasn't playing on our parts; this was pent up rage. It was also at this time that a profound depression descended upon me like those fogs of old that would beset London for weeks. I recall with clarity wanting to die. I found respite in books such as "I Never Promised You a Rose Garden" and "Lisa, Bright and Dark."

Fabiola suddenly began to call herself Yvette and kept to herself. I stopped seeing her as did most people. My family moved from the area and I don't know what happened with her. I've tried to find her name in the usual search engines, but she isn't there. Given her opting to use a different name already at such a young age, I can imagine that she has no desire to be found. I had a call from somebody a few years ago and I asked about Fabiola. Sandra had not seen her, but her Dad came up in conversation. She too thought, given his moves upon her, that he was a pervert.

Thus my quandry. I've taken the courses, read the books and met the monsters. I know better. I know that people like him do not change. They enter crime cycles and become emboldened when they are not caught. I feel like I need to report him. But, if his daughter hasn't done so, will I do more harm? Or is it me I strive to protect? I know the system. I know that they will have to inform my employer and not one individual there can refrain from gossip. I have never told my parents. It would kill them. For what? The man is probably dead. Given his age, even if I provided any evidence that corroborated Pam's or Fabiolo's, he would be given the usual slap on the wrist.

I grieve for Fabiola. I know as an adult that he molested her. All the signs are there. And I see what my very brief exposure to him was like; how it seemed to have changed me. I cannot imagine the horror she faced being alone with that man every day. To this day I hate the show Kojak as he looked like Telly Savalas. To what extent can I blame the sudden change in my behavior on him? My issues with food? My reluctance to trust people? My forays into self injurying? There were no hints of any of these problems until I met that man.

I hunted out of yearbook from Grade 8; the last year I knew her. I hope she made it and didn't fall into the usual pitfalls that so many girls exposed to these monsters become encased in.

She was so smart and had so much promise. And I hate that all these years later I am still somehow weighing the options because of his behavior.