NOT THE PRINCE

`````We all know somebody who has a type. It's usually a guy who is steadfast in not dating somebody that isn't a hottie or lacks large breasts. There's nothing wrong with having standards and sticking to them. For instance, ruling out racists or people who won't pick up a book is a good rule of thumb. But, what of those odd decisions that guide our choices?

`````I had a friend that wouldn't move in with somebody due to one item of furniture that he would not part with. They had been dating for sometime and this was the next logical progression. It was being discussed. However, Bob had a wagon wheel coffee table. It wasn't an antique that had borne his relatives across the great plains or anything. It was manufactured. My friend was studying at a fashion institute at the time and was interning with a woman whose name frequently came up in magazines as a consultant for future trends. Think "The Devil Wears Prada" and you'll get an idea of the work environment. There were certain boundaries she would not cross and her fine tastes coexisting with Bob's table was such a line in the sand. No cocktail parties could ever be held with that----thing---in the middle of the room. The relationship faltered as a result.

`````A male friend of mine, who was gay, just couldn't get over how "straight" one of his interests dressed. He always wore sneakers instead of dress shoes, wailed my buddy. I digress, but I always figured that there was a market like "Ger-Animals" for men. Those are those clothes where, if one bought an item of clothing that had a tiger on a label, it would be guaranteed to match with all other clothes that bore a tiger on the label. It would probably sell well for the newly divorced guys forced to shop alone at Walmart.

`````As shallow as it may sound, we all have our own Rubicon. One of mine happens to be country music. I loathe it. It's up there with telemarketers on my list of things that may one day inspire a spree shooting episode. Like people with severe peanut allergies, I cannot risk my being exposed to it.

`````I also have an aversion to mullets and bad facial hair. It's been my experience that said hair style is usually sported by a certain type of male. That guy tends to cross into my category of big picture reasons for avoiding somebody (redneck, proudly uneducated and a hater of cats).

`````When partners attempt to kill each other after snapping because they couldn't take the cap being left off the toothpaste one more time, I think it's important to be honest with oneself about this stuff at the very start. I guess I'd rather be single then have to listen to Shania Twain any day.