THE MYSTERY THAT CONTINUES TO ELUDE MANKIND

CARTOON FOUND ON WEB IMAGE SEARCH FOR 'MISSING SOCKS'

The Swiss have just recreated the minutes after the big bang, thanks to their hadron collider. We have unravelled much of the mysteries of our genetic coding. But, there is one puzzle which we have yet to solve, and that's what happens to the socks? You know what I'm talking about; after taking items out of the dryer and putting them away, a lone sock remains. Unless you're a person with a peg-leg, this doesn't do any good.
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I recall reading a letter to Dear Abby or some such columnist about this once. She had sought help from "experts." They always state the obvious, such as the possibility of the sock clinging onto another piece of clothing or having been dropped en route from the dryer to where ever it is that a person folds their laundry. Bull. I've got pretty astute observation skills (thanks to the way I manifest OCD), and I think I'd notice a single sock sitting on my floor after a couple of years. Likewise, if it was snagged on the back of a clothing item, somebody would point it out.
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I actually began to put them aside with a clip and there's quite a collection now. Socks without partners. Lonely. Mismatched. Sometimes I give up all hope that their mate will regret their wanton ways and return home, and the sock is put to good use, such as tying off the outdoor water tap in winter.
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Is sock suicide the problem? They just decide to take the proverbial long walk off a short pier one day? Can they dematerialize if the spin cycle is fast enough, only to reappear in some other laundry basket on the other side of the planet? I'm imagining something between "The Philadelphia Experiment" and the "Fly." Perhaps the spinning reaches Tesla's suppressed electrical frequency and poof---the sock goes. Or, does the sock sacrifice itself so that its Siamese twin can live free? Perhaps it's decided to become a nudist and sheds his inhibitions.
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I once lived in an apartment complex which had a shared laundry room. I always checked to make sure that it was clean and empty before loading anything in it, as I didn't want to be washing somebody's forgotten ink pen with my whites. After conducting such a check, I once found a pair of satin, paisley bikini underwear in my laundry basket. So, sometimes they do come back...even though it may not be to the correct owner.
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One day, I finally heard a logical answer: the sock goes over the top of the spinning barrel if it's overloaded, then slides down and settles under the drum. This came from a repairman on a talkshow who insisted that he's found numerous socks in this locale. Trust me, I don't want to know what a tangled web is down there. If this is true, it's probably a nasty fire trap or just waiting to grind to a halt any minute now (another bill that I cannot afford).
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I guess this is one mystery that won't truly be solved until they run tests over and over with a GPS tracking device attached. Only then can one of mankind's greatest puzzles be solved.